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Reflections from the SwampMurdoch comes to The Swamp

Murdoch comes to The Swamp

Reflections from the Swamp
Richard van Duyvendyk

Shots were heard in the swamp on a night with only a tiny sliver of the moon to dispel the darkness. Days later, I discovered the body of a beaver floating among the lily pads.

I called Murdoch to investigate. Julia came with him, as she often does, and determined that the beaver had been dead for about three days. Murdoch genuflected, and Julia moved the body in my wheelbarrow to my picnic table for an autopsy. Murdoch picked up the shotgun shells he found on the driveway and placed them in a ziplock bag that formally housed a peanut and jelly sandwich. Julia surgically removed the brain with my Swiss army knife and put the 00 Buckshot in my favourite coffee cup Ginger made. I invited them in for a coffee. Murdoch (William) determined that a 12-gauge shotgun had killed the beaver.

Murdoch noticed a 12-gauge shotgun hanging above the cookstove but said nothing about it. Did he think I might be a suspect?

My bride and I have been watching Murdoch Mysteries for about 14 years. We have a coathanger hanging off the TV, which brings in about four stations. My bride, although faithful, has other boyfriends. These include William and Ian Hanahandsome. Hanahandsome does the CBC news on weekends.

I have always liked Julia. She’s beautiful, intelligent, and not at all squeamish. Julia can be pretty blunt and straightforward like somebody else I know. She saves William’s life about four times a year while William rescues Julia from kidnappers and hooligans regularly. They are the staunchest of allies.

I was intrigued that William and Julia had the time to solve the mystery of the beaver from Corkery Swamp. I also asked if William had invented a time machine that could project them a hundred years into the future. I was shocked to learn that they live in the here and now and don’t live in the early 1900s.

Johnny Harris(George Crabtree) plays a constable on the show. He also does a show called “Still Standing” about small towns on the ropes. He tried to come to Corkery but got lost and couldn’t find the downtown. Jonny getting lost happened before Killeen put up a Corkery sign.

William explained that during the summer, CBC uses reruns of old Murdoch shows. Reruns allow Julia and William to go on vacation, solve murders such as the murder of the Corkery beaver, and do commercials for Intact Insurance. William likes wearing knee-high rubber boots and hanging around in flooded basements during commercials. He was very impressed with my hip waders and was excited to use them to retrieve the body of the beaver. While in the water, I asked him to clean the culvert and look for additional evidence.

I told Julia that I wrote for a prestigious online paper in Almonte and was drawn to the idea of using reruns of some of my articles during the summer. I’m presently working full-time building decks without a pickup truck. I’m busier than a rabbit in the mating season. The van just isn’t the same as a truck. I was a carpenter and always had an old pickup truck to pick up lumber, gravel, and manure for the garden. I started reminiscing about my old truck, Gloria, and our adventures. She suggested that I ask Brent, the editor, to publish my Truck story again as a rerun.

Several years ago, I wrote a story for The Millstone about my truck, Gloria. Hopefully, Brent will add the story to this preamble. It’s about a loving relationship between a man and his truck.

Best wishes, Truckless in Corkery

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